Ringmaster Of The Shit Show Matching Set
Cosmic Rebel Shop’s matching “Ringmaster of the Shit Show” set is the perfect gift for new moms entering the wild, wild circus that is motherhood. Choose from classic white tees or two colors of raglan tees to fit your exact style.
And if you prefer to keep your threads PG, the Etsy shop can edit the shirt’s caption to be sans curse words. (Which is admittedly easier than keeping your kid from turning “shit” into their new favorite word.)
Custom Grandkid Candle Label
This Mother’s Day, address the neverending inquiry into when you’re finally going to give your mom grandkids head-on. 904 Custom’s grandkid candle label might not have the cuddle potential of a little grandbaby, but it does make the house smell way better.
Opt for a sugared orange, sweet jasmine, or island volcano candle with your purchase, or stick with just the label to personalize your mom’s fav candle scent.
Funny Wine Gift Bag
Showing up to a Mother’s Day celebration with nothing but a bottle of booze might seem a bit impersonal—that is, unless that bottle of booze is tucked away in one of these hilarious customized gift bags. With all-too-apt quips like “because you can’t drink flowers” and “Mom juice” to choose from, these versatile totes can store virtually any 750 mL wine bottle and most liquor fifths.
VINAKAS Comfort Cotton Socks
Pair the clever wine tote with a pair of high-quality cotton and polyester socks from VINAKAS. The ‘secret’ message that appears when these socks’ lucky recipient kicks their feet up is made from anti-slip, raised rubber letters. So, go ahead, drink that third glass; these socks will hold up in dangerously slippy situations (be it from the floor shellac or the Sauvignon Blanc).
Weird Moms Build Character T-Shirt
This hilariously honest t-shirt from Narwood Clothier says it all. Your personality didn’t become the weird, wacky, wonderful anomaly it is all on its own. Chances are, the lady who raised you had a big hand in making you who you are today, so why not give her some garb to celebrate that fact? The dark heather gray tee is made out of ultra-soft ringspun cotton, which means she’ll be excited to wear it, not obligated.
Funny Mother’s Day Canvas Tote
Being a mom means carrying everything for every occasion for everyone. Handbag who?! Celebrate her transition from designer bags to diaper bags with a durable, washable, and on-point canvas tote. The stuff inside might not belong to her, but the bag certainly does (that is, until one of the kiddos grows up and asks to borrow—ahem, steal—it).
Granny Shark Needs a Drink Wine Glass
Baby Shark swam into the zeitgeist in 2015. Six years later, the song has been permanently embedded into the brains of anyone who regularly hangs out with kids under eight—most notably, your kids’ grandma.
Baby Shark might be inescapable, but as anyone who’s attended a karaoke night can attest, a glass of wine makes just about anything sound good (okay, tolerable). Help Gran get through the 1,945,678th replay of Baby Shark with a doo, doo, doo, doo da-dynamite wine glass.
Decorative Toilet Paper Roll Transfer
By the time a mother becomes a grandmother, she has undoubtedly changed a ridiculous amount of diapers, including yours. And while there’s never an adequate way to repay someone for wiping your (and your kids’) tushes over the past 20+ years, this decorative toilet paper roll is a pretty hilarious place to start. Sweet Southern Craft Co. provides the iron-on transfer; you do the rest.
Hilarious Mother-In-Law Mug
Let’s be honest; the only woman who understands how bad your hubby is at remembering holidays is his mother. Moonlight Sunrise’s microwave- and dishwasher-safe mug is a funny, lighthearted way to show your MIL how much you love her (and lovingly poke fun at a forgetful husband).
The eye-catching floral design and crisp cursive and print fonts are sublimated into the white ceramic, not stuck on like a sticker or vinyl, ensuring your gift’s long life and lots of laugh potential.
FixGrub Mom Cooking Apron
Make sure that no one forgets who the real boss of the kitchen is with this professional-grade kitchen apron made from heavy-duty cotton featuring reinforced waist pockets, an adjustable neck strap, and a bonus food-safe silicone spatula. We can do all things through Mom, who strengthens us.
Personalized Super Mom Book
Moms aren’t just mothers—they’re chefs, launderers, house cleaners, chauffeurs, conflict resolution specialists, tutors, medics, and team managers. It can be challenging to find a gift that accurately represents how grateful we are for these superhuman women in our lives.
One gift that gets remarkably close is I See Me’s personalized Super Mom softcover book. This customized, 20-page book celebrates just how hard she works day in and day out in a unique, heartwarming way she’s sure to adore.
How to Traumatize Your Children Book
How’s your kid supposed to grow up as funny and quick-witted as you if you don’t subject them to a healthy dose of loving trauma? Knock Knock’s bestselling How to Traumatize Your Children has been revamped with new, hysterically dysfunctional illustrations and parenting advice dripping in side-splitting sardonicism.
Grandkids Welcome, Others Tolerated Doormat
Hamlin Row Shop sums up the Ultimate Grandma Energy™ with their customizable, 100% natural coir doormat. This unapologetically honest welcome mat is available in four sizes. We recommend keeping this all-natural, coconut husk fiber doormat out of the elements as much as possible for easy maintenance.
Of All The Vaginas In The World Mug
Out of all of the things a mother does for her children, the most impressive, intense, and honestly, insane was birthing the kids in the first place. For that, your mom deserves all the presents in the world.
But since buying your mom unfathomable riches might not be in the budget this year, Backyard Peaks offers the next best thing: a customizable mug celebrating your mother’s most significant feats (and your grand arrival).
Mama Needs a Mother F*cking Nap: A Sweary Coloring Book for Mom
One of the best parts about having kiddos around is having ready access to coloring books and supplies. Coloring is therapeutic, relaxing, and fulfilling—but after a long day of having PBS Kids burned into your eyeballs, the last thing you want to look at is more cartoon characters.
Luckily, Honey Badger Coloring has created a gorgeous, unique coloring book for potty-mouthed Moms looking for a bit of artistic release.